Wednesday, September 19, 2012

finding purpose {a constant struggle}

have you seen Wanderlust with Paul Rudd and Jennifer Aniston? You know, the one where they find themselves at a hippie house in the middle of nowhere? Well, if you haven't seen it you should, funny stuff and totally great date night at home movie. 

The character played by Jennifer Aniston hasn't found her niche yet. She goes from job to job. She hasn't yet found that perfect job that makes her happy and actually pays her money and of course that she is good at. That could be the story of my life right now. 

I have tons of side projects that can be seen as a hobby, but I feel like I am missing something. I haven't found that thing that is me. I have had plenty of jobs since I graduated college, 3 major career type jobs in the last 6 year, but none of them seemed to fully complete me. I know that I can go out and find a job here in VA. I have found 2 jobs in the past 3 years, so this economic job drama doesn't scare me. The issue I have is figuring out what the heck I want to do with my life. 

There I said it. What do I want to do with my life. 

headband: made by me // earrings, bracelet and necklace: c/o World Market // top: Forever 21 // belt: came w/a skirt from F21 // skirt: Target // Toms: Nordstrom

My dear sweet husband has the best intentions but his constant talk of going to get his MBA and asking me about when I am going to go back to school for my Masters has be bashing my head against a wall. That might be a bit of an extreme statement but my husband calls me E.J. {extrmeme Jenelle} so I will allow the statement to stay. 

There is the constant debate of your job not being something your love, and is in fact just a J.O.B. This is such a frustrating topic for me. I want to just be able to say whatever, I go somewhere monday-friday from 8-5, collect a paycheck and carry on with my life. This idea just doesn't work for me. I know there is something I am meant to do on this earth. I'm not talking first woman president worthy, but something that is rewarding and worthy to me.

I remember graduating college 6 years ago and having a plan of how my life was going to go. I also knew that I might as well throw the plan out the window because chances are i would want to go left and life would send me right. 

Right around the six month mark of graduating college I landed a gig at a financial institution. I was the assistant to a New Business Officer. That basically meant I organized all the the info for new investment accounts. I learned how to read and diagram a trust document, I learned more than I ever wanted to about stocks, bonds and account statements. I then also started working with the marketing department. I learned some things I liked and didn't like about the job. The biggest thing I realized is I am not a fan of corporate America. The games and the politics are exhausting. I was good at some of the politicing, but at times I failed miserably. 

My last two jobs were working with military families. While I enjoyed most aspects of the jobs there were certain things that just didn't work for me. I didn't feel like the end goal was to truly help the families and servicemembers, but instead to make sure they{the entities I was working for} were showing the Department of Defense what they think the DOD wanted. 

So in sum here is what I have learned, I love marketing and being creative, I don't want to work for corporate America and I want work with military families. 

I realize I have shared many posts discussing the topic of my purpose, but God keeps telling me I am not quite there yet. I have started exploring some options to get to this "dream job".  I know it isn't something that happens overnight, but feeling lost isn't always fun. I keep reminding myself God has a plan and in due time it will all come together. I just  want to be sure I am not missing any signs he is trying to show me, word on the street is sometimes I can be a bit hard headed. 

p.s. don't forget about this deal going on in the shop 


Bernadette Veenstra said...

I think you are on the right track. You have seen what your strengths and interests are, as well as non interests. But the most important thing is that you are seeking God about this. He will lead you where He wants you to go. So keep trusting.

Cassi said...

I am at the same point right now. I totally understand the dilema of trying to decided your purpose in God's plan.

The Remodeled Life said...

I think so many of us can relate to this. You are so right though, God does have a plan for you and He has given you so many talents and interests for a reason. I think it's awesome that God has given you a heart for military families, I'm sure there are so many who need love and support and comfort. I just found your blog but I will be praying for you :).

Lisa @ MMT said...

I am on the same page. I've been thinking about this a lot lately and feeling frustrated that I haven't found my niche in life. I want to go back to school and get my degree but I just don't know what to get it in. I've been doing the same as you, leaning on God and praying to him to guide me to my purpose in life. I hope we both find it soon!

Mandy @ This Girl's Life said...

Cute cute outfit! I found a long sleeve chambray shirt at TJ Maxx over the weekend and I can't wait to pair it with one of my maxi skirt (it was too cold today to wear a skirt and sandals...crazy!) And I'm 34 and still wonder what I want to be when I "grow up". I work 8-5 and right now it is necessary for my family but I daydream all the time about being able to create all day and have my dream job. It can happen!

Ernestine Edna said...

I love your much, thanks again for helping me find information for my friend. You are such a blessing, Jenelle, don't forget that.

Ashley said...

Even though I made the leap to work for myself and work from home, I still feel like my purpose is somewhat lacking. I love what I do, but it doesn't feel like it's the perfect fit just yet. It truly is a constant struggle, but I think that's what makes life interesting. :)

- ashley

Beach Momma said...

Sounds very similar to what I am going through! Cute blog, new follower

MissRockwell said...

You are definitely not alone. I mean I love what I do but I'm not IN LOVE with it if you know what I mean. I want, no, I need a job wherein I can wake up jumping for joy that I have to work. But then I rethink and ask myself what if my current job IS what God purposefully planned for me. Am I then being ungrateful?

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